Saturday, May 22, 2010

The truth has set her free

The truth has set her free


Well Dawn has made her final journey, she has met her savior face to face and the pain has left her body, praise God! Yes I praise God that she is with Him, I praise Him that she has moved in to her new home, and yes I still praise God that He has counted us worthy to endure this trial. You see we truly believe that the Lord has and always will have our best interest at heart, and because of that we can also know that we as a family will come through this. Yes our hearts are hurting, yes our tears are flowing, yes we miss our beloved wife and mother, and yes we even sometimes question God, but these things will never change the truth, the truth that He is God!

As I look back on the events of the past six months I cannot help but be amazed and blessed by what I have seen, the people we have encountered, and the lessons we have learned. I have seen and felt the pain of seeing a loved one consumed and succumb to a deadly and vicious disease, a disease intent on destroying life. It seems rather ironic to me that cancer survives and thrives on living cells, consuming them with an intensity that eventually causes its own death. I see it as very much the same pattern that evil has in this world. The desire to consume all it can while it can, only to end up dying from its consumption, and by its death and the death of that which it consumes life comes forth. Life free from the possibility of cancer or the influence of the evil that destroyed it, yet the evil dies never again to wreak havoc. And to think there are those out there who chose to believe in this evil, those who place their trust in its consuming power, those who deny the obvious in order to maintain a false sense of control. May I just say this one thing; the path Dawn has taken awaits each and every one of us, we must all walk into the next life, and unlike Dawn some will have made the wrong choice, some will have held on to their false sense of security, only to realize the truth in the end, but for them it will be too late. I implore you today to take a look, to view the Gospel with the same open mind you have viewed other thoughts, ideas, or religions. For if you do I believe that you too will find the truth, and the truth will make you free!

Gene Burroughs

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

A Victorious Moment

A Victorious Moment


Tonight as I sat with Dawn, holding her silky soft hand and stroking her still long and beautiful blonde hair, I couldn’t help but be angry as I viewed the abrasion on her cheek. Here she lays this woman of God, facing her last moments on earth in a body riddled with cuts, bruises, abrasions, and disease, all of them constant reminders of the frailty of the human body. This body was not the one that had been used so mightily on so many occasions for the glory of God. No this body was one riddled with the marks and scars that come from being trapped in an earthly tent while being subjected to the trials and tribulations of this world. Her inner body now consumed by this terrible disease called cancer, even though unseen for the most part it has now made itself known largely by the distention in her stomach region. Her face scarred by a fall, as her body failed her while doing all she could to not be a burden to her loved ones. A plethora of bruises all received as her body tricked her in to thinking she had the strength she needed yet without warning her knees would buckle and send her falling in pain to the ground. And if that was not enough, this very body which had now confined her to her bed is left with the marks of this confinement in the form of horrifically painful bed sores. Now do you understand why I felt angry? Let me explain if I may the true source of my frustration. You see the condition of Dawns body was quite simply a prime example of what satan does to all mankind. A prime example of how he desires and does treat every single person who he maintains control over. Every person who places their trust in the deceiver and thief of souls will find themselves faced with much the same if not worse treatment as well. You see he loves to deceive, he loves to destroy, and he loves to blame others in the process, and given the opportunity he will do just that. However in Dawn’s case his plans were foiled, oh yes he may have had some temporary joy in her misery, but the key word here is temporary. For you see at 11:20 pm on Tuesday evening the 18th of May 2010 Dawn left that broken body and met Jesus face to face! And no matter how difficult satan made it, no matter how much pain, frustration, fear, anguish, or any of a number of negative emotions he inflicted, he was unable to dissuade Dawn or anyone else from believing the truth. As a matter of fact many came to know Jesus as their personal savior as a result of Dawn’s suffering and perseverance through it. For all intense and purposes his plans backfired upon him, just as they always do when faithful people face hopeless situations by placing their trust in God, and their hope in Jesus. I would ask today that you consider lifting our children and our family once again before our Lord each time you think of us. While we have loaned our Mother, Friend, Wife, Patriarch, Mentor, Companion and Lover to the Lord for safe keeping for a time and knowing that she is in the safest and greatest of hands, our hearts are broken. There are now holes and gaps in those places that Dawn’s presence once filled, and while the Spirit of God will fill them there is no worldly replacement for the physical presence of a mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend, mentor, and leader such as Dawn. Yes we will miss her, no we will never forget her, and yes no one could ever replace her, and in honor of her if for no other reason, our faith in God will grow stronger with each passing moment of each and every day! I thank you all from the bottom of my heart for every prayer, word of encouragement, meal, flower, gift of time, gift of labor, financial assistance, rides, and so much more, that we have received, we count ourselves truly blessed by each of you even in the midst of our sorrow. Your love and devotion is like a salve to a wound, providing soothing comfort each time it is applied, just as the Lord Himself provides us with His healing touch each time we cry out. Without Him we would suffer and perish, and with Him, and because of Him we will rule and reign forever with eternal peace and joy!

Gene Burroughs Pastor

Monday, May 17, 2010

Give me Jesus

Give me Jesus


There is a very simple song written by Fernando Ortega and recorded by many that has the best four word chorus anyone could ever ask for; “Give me Jesus”. The version I enjoy most was recorded by Vince Gill. The biggest challenge of this song however is to get through it without weeping profusely, which I might add I have rarely if ever been able to accomplish. A few mornings ago Dawn and I had one of those extra special opportunities to spend a quiet moment together prior to the waking of the remainder of our household. Being fully aware that these opportunities may soon be gone and now unable to converse with Dawn I chose to play Vince’s version of the song over Dawn. As I sat there listening to the words and thinking of our many years shared in service to the Lord, (crying of course) a particular line of the song struck me as it never had before. While I’m convinced that Fernando had an understanding of the depth of this phrase (after all he wrote it), I’m equally convinced that most people are unable to, simply because they have never truly needed to. In this phrase he writes; “you may have all of this world, just give me Jesus”. You see this statement can easily be accepted with the simplicity of which it was written, however when you truly have had all this world can offer, and have come to the end of days, it is only then that you truly do understand how little this world can give. You see Dawn has been diagnosed, she has received all of the treatments, there is nothing else that this world can offer her, I, our children, or anyone else that will take away the pain of our impending loss, her gain. The world had its chance with Dawn, in this life it offered her despair, trials, pain, and eventually sickness unto death. Yet in its attempt to utterly destroy her she has become victorious, she found hope, joy, salvation, love, and so much more! She found along her way a savior, a promise for the future. She defied the world, she beat the odds, and she shared this Jesus with everyone she met, Dawn has given her all and now she will follow the lead of her savior and defeat the world one final time! She will reap the rewards that the world cannot give, healing for an eternity, a crown of jewels, a reward fit for a queen, all that the world could not give she will soon receive! All heaven awaits the arrival of this well known servant of the King and surely she will hear Him say “Well done thou good and faithful servant”. If there is one message I would choose to pass along to all who read these words it would be this: the trials, tribulations, troubles and despair that you have experienced in this life are all the world truly has to offer, and nothing more! Oh you may think that there is more, sure you may enjoy sports, family, and so much more, all of which I too enjoy. But one the one thing you can never have without Jesus is the most important of all, eternal peace. This peace cannot be purchased, it cannot be earned, it cannot be found in any other way, it can only be found by believing that Jesus is the son of God and by choosing to allow Him to be Lord of your life. “You may have all of this world, just give me Jesus”!

Gene Burroughs

PS Dawn is unresponsive these days, her pain level is rather high and the slightest movement causes her great pain and frustration. There will soon be a day when her healing is complete; either here or in heaven she will be healed. This healing will come by His hand and in His time, and as my children and I have talked at length about it will be ultimately the very best because after all He wants what is best for all of us, even those who deny Him.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

The Room of Regrets

“The Room of Regrets”


When you are facing a trial that is as intense as the one we have found ourselves in you visit often the “room of regrets”, you know that place in each of our brains where we store up the “shoulda, coulda, woulda” stuff. We tend to avoid this room much like the hall closet where everyone just opens the door enough to shove in that item we need to hide. The problem is that some day that closet will need to be cleaned, someday we will need something tucked away in there, and no matter how much we do not want to be the one to deal with it, we must, so in we go. With Dawn facing (short of intervention by the Lord) her entrance into the Lords presence I have found myself spending a lot of time in the “room of regrets” seeking to clean it out before it’s too late. You see once Dawn has moved on the door becomes locked, it will still exist of course, however I will no longer be able to clean it up. This room will then become a constant reminder of the shoulda, coulda, woulda, burdens of life, a permanent sanctuary of the things in life that would seek to bring me down, a chamber of negative thoughts locked away forever. Their only purpose to cause me pain and remind me of my failures in regards to my relationship with my wife. You see I know about this room all too well, I have another room, filled with those regrets. In 1988 my father died without warning from a massive MI (heart attack), and the door to the room of regrets between he and I was locked forever with no opportunity for cleaning. It remains to this day a room filled with the “shoulda, coulda, woulda’s “of our relationship, a constant reminder of all the things we left unsaid, the hurt, the pain, and the selfishness of our interaction. Thankfully the Lord has also placed a lock upon that door, and His is made of blood, the redeeming blood of Jesus, the sacrificial blood of the lamb that heals wounds, and brings about forgiveness. Oh yes it eases the pain, but the memories will always remain.

Dawn and I have had the wonderful opportunity over the past few months to clean this room, to empty it out, and to refill it with joy, peace, and healing, it is no longer the room of regrets a place of destruction, no now it is the room of restoration. No longer will it be a room to be avoided, but rather now a place of refuge, a place of strength, a place of healing, and a room to be treasured. A room where the blood of the lamb provides warmth and comfort like that favorite blanket on a cold winter night, in front of a warming fire. Oh what joy I have in knowing that each one of my children will not be left with a room of regret where their mother is concerned, for they have been blessed by the peace of our God.

My question now has become one of deeper concern, are there other rooms that I have hidden away, are there those closets in my life as the results of broken relationships with others? If so then I must find them and while I am able I must open the door, and clean up the mess, the one I have been avoiding for so long. How about you, do you have “rooms of regrets” closets or warehouses filled with anger, resentment, and hurtful words cast out in a moment of rage? If so may I suggest that you too do yourself the favor of cleaning them up, our God will give you strength, and there is “healing in His wings”. The only regret will be if someday, somehow, this room becomes locked forever a tomb filled with pain and suffering, a “room of regrets”.

Gene Burroughs

PS. Dawn spends most of her time sleeping these days; she eats very little and has become extremely weak. We thank you all for your continued prayers, love, support, cards, and meals, for we know without them we would never make it through our pain, but our God is able and He has truly become our strength!

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Think Bigger

“Think Bigger”


Over the past few days our family has been gathering to say their goodbyes, pay their respects, and to somehow begin the process of closure each in their own way. During this time Dawn as well has been closing this chapter in her life, while starting a new one in her next. For over three weeks she has been taking tours of heaven with Jesus, as if He were introducing her to her new home, getting her acclimated to her new surroundings. She tells of many things she has seen, the beauty of the city, the peacefulness of the surroundings, and the joy that her heart feels when she is there. As she began her journey she would desire to return and the Lord would graciously allow her to rejoin us, always inviting her back at her choosing. Some day’s she would choose not to visit but rather to stay with us, other days she would be anxious to Know more, and off she would go to take one of her ever increasing in length adventures with her savior. As she revealed the secrets of heaven to me there became an ever present statement that the Lord would leave her with, “Think bigger Dawn, think bigger”. She tells me now, when possible that is, that no matter how large she would allow her imagination to become Jesus would always tell her “Think bigger”. Each passing day Dawn spends a little more time in heaven and a lot less time here with us. It appears that she has become more comfortable with her new home than her old, and she is about to move in.

When I reflect upon this process I cannot help but think once again about the graciousness and faithfulness of our Lord. He has allowed Dawn, her family and friends months of time to catch up, say their goodbyes, receive her counsel, and each in our own way to prepare for her journey. And now He is preparing her for where she will be going, He has allowed her to live with one foot in this world and one in heaven, gradually drawing her in to her final place of eternal life, her new home. This my friends is the God of all creation, the one many blame for far too many things that we have caused, the God who allows us to choose our eternal resting place, the God who loves not just us but our families and friends as well, even those who may not believe that He exists. I could never say or do enough to thank the Lord for the 36 years that Dawn and I have known each other and the 31 plus years spent as husband and wife. Yet as much as I love her, as much as we are one, through it all I see that He loves her so much more than I, you see He is teaching me to think bigger as well. Not bigger events, not bigger gatherings, not bigger ideas, not bigger anything here on this earth except bigger love, and bigger in terms of Him. No matter how much we attempt to imagine the depths of His love, His grace, His mercy, His compassion, or any other aspect of God we must always think bigger, wow!

Yesterday I was sitting with Dawn in our room, she was visiting her new home, I of course was in our present one, as my heart was aching over the loss of our ability to communicate, to hold one another, or just walk together I was being reminded of our coming separation. The pain I felt was so intense, so painful, that to dwell upon it brought no good thought or reaction simply suffering such as I have never known. However in the next room I could hear the joys and laughter of our children and grandchildren as they played and spent time together, such joy, such expression of love for one another, and yes in the midst of chaos great peace. As I reflected upon this moment, my feelings, and our lives, I could not help but wonder, “Is this a view of what each of us will see for eternity?” Will those who have chosen to deny Jesus as the Christ the Son of the living God spend their eternal lives suffering as I have for just a moment the pain of separation, the ache without end? Will those of us who do believe spend our eternal existence in a place of child like laughter, joy, and love? Yes I do believe that to a certain degree this too must be true, only even now I must “Think Bigger”.

Gene Burroughs

Saturday, May 1, 2010

My Honest Answer

My Honest Answer
I awoke this morning as I do most now pondering the events of the previous day and considering what this day may hold in store; what new challenges will we face, will there be any victories? Yesterday a dear friend and relative asked me how I was doing, and how I was getting through this. I can honestly say I was not able to give him a quick canned or spiritually motivated biblically referenced answer; it’s not that I didn’t have one; it is rather that my friend wanted to know honestly how I was getting through this. I think that all too often we as believers (me included) have been quick to quote passages or quotes we picked up somewhere in order to in all honesty mask the pain that we were truly feeling. When in reality we are human flesh first and believers second, and the further reality is that sometimes we truly are in pain, or are hurting, and yet we are not completely honest for one reason or another. Therefore in the spirit of complete and open honesty I would like to share with whoever reads this exactly how I am feeling, and how I am coping with the probable loss of my wife of 31+ years, the mother of my three children, my best friend, the most Godly and supportive person I have ever met, and my partner in ministry and in life, the only person who truly knows and understands me. First of all I am angry that it is happening, not at God, or at man, I am angry that because of the fall of mankind this pain can and is inflicted upon people every day. I am disappointed in myself for ever neglecting to understand how much pain others have suffered when their loved ones have gone on. I am hurting for my children, this is not a road that they should be required to travel, their pain is real and they are still very young to be losing their mother, (even Katie), and even though we have been completely honest and open the reality of this loss will continue for their lifetime. I am confident however that will be able to grow from this, that if their mother does pass they truly will be able to heal, and eventually increase their faith as a result. I am fearful of what the future may hold; will we have a home, will I be able to provide adequately for them, can I get and stay healthy, and so on and so on. And then I am reminded,” My God is Faithful”, I don’t work for man I serve Him, He is the God who has provided for all of our needs, He has taken these vessels formed from dirt and made them whole and complete, and He promises in His word that He “will never leave nor forsake us” and He has never done so. You ask me how do I have the strength to get through this, the strength to face the future, may I boldly say in all honesty, “I lift my eyes to the hills, from where does my help come? My help comes from the Lord who made heaven and earth.” (Psalm 121:1-2). No really I am being honest now, I am not mad at God, I am not calloused, I am not happy, I am fearful, I am concerned, I am weak and unable to face this challenge on my own, I am full of so many emotions that I cannot describe them all, but I know beyond all doubt where my strength is coming from!
The question I have in my mind now however is this; “how does anyone face such pain, sorrow, loss, fear, and anguish, without the help of the God who not only made them but also made heaven and earth? This is the question I cannot answer with any honesty, insight, or understanding. Please hear me when I say I would never judge those who do not have this faith and I am truly sorry for ever doing so. However I don’t know how they can do it, you see if I look at my honest response, and remove faith and hope from my answer then all I see is darkness and despair and if belief in God does nothing more than help one cope with such darkness and despair upon this earth then isn’t it worth the effort. Is it not worth looking in to, it cost us nothing, there is little required of us, we don’t even have to go to Church, all we need do is believe, I wonder is it really that difficult to do so? I honestly don’t know dear friends, I have believed so long I cannot imagine what it is like not to, I only know that my strength comes from the Lord and my only disappointment is in the enemies ability to sell the lie to so many. Please don’t buy it from him, he is the greatest liar and con-man of all time, he has sold many on the idea of blaming God for the failures of man, and he can offer nothing but despair and hopelessness in return. And that my friend is my utmost and honest opinion!
Today the Hospice nurse will be coming to our home, she feels she can actually help Dawn to improve somewhat, we are hopeful and praying. Also please remember to pray for Jeff and Shauna Halls newborn babies, Autumn and Aria they were born pre-mature and have some serious health issues and we ask that the Lord heal them and bring them home to mommy and daddy.
Gene Burroughs