Friday, October 29, 2010

Joy in the midst of Pain

A few evenings ago the girls and I were at Michaela's basketball game, (which of course they won) and we ran across a couple of college students who are very dear to us; and since College students are always hungry we of course invited them to dinner. Oh wait I need to back up a few days.
  For the past three weekends and the upcoming one I have been very busy with retreats, seminars, and weddings, all of which have prevented the girls and I from having our one complete day off together. Needless to say last Saturday I was feeling rather convicted and guilty for over scheduling my time (something I am far too guilty of), and I began to ask the Lord how I could redeem the time with my girls. Yes this sounds suspicious but I kept getting the feeling that I needed to go and purchase a game called WII Dance 2. Now mind you the girls had not asked for it or even mentioned it, so this wasn't a planted seed coming to life, no it was a new thought, I believe an inclination from the Lord. Needless to say on my way home the game found its way into my car and eventually into my living room where two girls were ecstatic with anticipation. Oh did I mention that there was also and inclination for Chinese food  (not from the Lord), and that too as well made it's way in to our home. Needless to say the fun that ensued was not suitable to be shown on facebook or you tube,(too embarrassing), but I have not laughed so hard in far too long. We danced and we laughed until we cried, and then we danced some more, let me just say my girls have got some moves, but the old man did win twice, yeah I still got it just not as much! Now back to my story, well actually just continuing on.
 After a healthy dose of chili and cornbread we were all ready to burn a few calories, so yes you guessed it, out comes WII Dance 2. Did I fail to mention that one of these college students a young woman has virtually grown up around my family and well lets just say she knows how to have fun. Here friend (not a date) is a fun young man whom we have just recently befriended and he too knows how to have a good time. Well I sat this one out and watched and laughed so hard I truly had to leave the room a few times, and I must say I was not the only one. Whomever was joining me on the sidelines had the privilege of doing so as well. After an hour or so of intense dance most were ready to move this show outside to cool off and enjoy a game of basketball. I again took the sidelines, opened the garage door and watched form afar as I worked out on the weight machine. As I watched and began to take in the surrounding scene my heart began to rejoice, and an overwhelming feeling of peace overtook me. The night was so quiet you could here a pin drop, the clouds had broken up and just a few lingered, the perfect amount to add a graceful glow to a nearly full moon beginning its rise. The only sounds were laughter and commands to cover someone or "I'm open", all sounds of joy, sounds of fun, the sounds of those who for at least a time were able to move beyond the loss.  I sat for what seemed like hours enjoying the sounds, relishing in the joy, and wondering what lies ahead. Oh yes I thought of Dawn as well, how she too would have sat beside me and laughed, how she would have dragged me up to join in the dance, oh how we loved to dance together. I thought of how she with her practical nature would have by now had girls in the showers, and ready for bed. And yet how even now if she could see she too would be smiling with me and probably shaking her head at my foolishness. It is times like this that I miss her more than ever, yet it is also times like this that help me to heal, you see there is joy after loss, we must simply seek it out, we must purpose to find it, recognize it, and take the time to enjoy it. We do not honor those who have gone on by mourning painfully, we do not honor our God by being angry and resentful, we honor them and so much more by doing what they would want us to do, by finding joy in the midst of our pain!

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